MAX ON MONDAY

In 1970, Australia’s commercial radio stations (all of them then broadcasting in glorious AM mono) refused to play records on the big British music labels due to a pay-for-play dispute with the record companies. This deprived listeners of 3XY and the greater 3UZ of some hot hits by some big name bands. Though the ban lasted only from May to October, rock devotees were force-fed inferior Australian cover versions to fill the void.
I am reminded of that six month culture drought every February. That’s when the Handy and Andy show first hits the tube for the year, again featuring the characters we have come to know and loathe – taciturn and tight-lipped coaches, over-coached and over-coaching umpires, swooning and ill-informed commentators and mountains-out-of molehill reporters. It’s the same old song on a new background and the product a mundane and barely recognisable cover version of Harrison and Wills, copyright 1858.
On Saturday, the real thing returned. Aussie Rules, the game we remember from our childhood, played by the real guardians of populo ludus populi, the Victorian Amateurs.
From A Section to D4, to the Club XVIII and the Unders – Nineteens, and for the first time this outing, the Eighteens – the April rituals have begun.
St Bede’s unfurled their first A Section flag. Such ceremonies have become par for the course at Brindisi Street in recent years and the faithful took it in their stride this year. Then came the first bounce. Already, there are questions about the reigning premier under their new coach. These are, “How good can they be?”, “Who can beat them”, “Who will beat them?” and “In which year might that happen?”
Such talk is premature, though Old Essendon might be thinking otherwise as they lick their scratches from a massive drubbing. In truth, the Tigers have lost but a few, while they have a whole new crop of U19 premiership players to choose from. Some of these will be genuine stars sooner rather than later.
I didn’t hang around for the final carnage, though much of it had already occurred before I departed. I headed up the highway to see the glamour squads do battle on South Road and conveniently for me, the second half was very late in commencing.
We have heard much these past weeks of the big recruiting efforts of Old Scotch and Old Brighton. On arrival, I noted that many of the marquee names hadn’t come up for the season opener. No Hendra or Ainley for the Tonners and the Cardinals were without Houlihan, Nathan Brown and Paul Licuria.
The Scotchies, however, did have James Byrne until a last quarter collision saw him hobble off with a wounded knee. By this time, he had done enormous damage and put the game beyond Brighton’s reach. His X-rays might be the most viewed and discussed document of the entire season.
David Spriggs made his debut in Brighton colours and was a handy player, though I must admit surprise when I saw him named as best. James Gerstman, lining up for the home team against his old club, pretty much escaped the rancour of his former fans, though he did cop a few good audible lines from former teammates. Gerta, though tall and well built, does not visibly stand out among the pack of monoliths that is Old Brighton in 2009. Sinclairs 1, 2 and 3, Matt Smith, Luke Mann, Josh Dickerson are all big units and one wonders where and how they might all fit in. Then there’s Adam Pirrie.
On Saturday night, I pondered the other scores from across the VAFA’s top tier. Old Ivanhoe’s victory at Marcellin was no shock, unlike De La’s victory at Toorak Park, which is a huge fillip for a club that has been widely and wildly rumoured to be already under pressure.
Under the spires, Collegians’ effort in the second half must have caused some consternation among the Lions’ faithful, while the crew at Uni Blues will be well satisfied with their first round coup. A Uni team that salutes in April can prove a dangerous unit later in the year.
There will be drama aplenty in this football season if its first returns are any guide. Whether clubs won or lost on Saturday, there is another fresh chance next week. “Can we capitalise on a strong start in round one?” or “can we atone for last week’s temporary aberration?” will be the coaching messages up and down all the VAFA sections this week. Well, can they? The beauty of it all, is that we get to watch. You just pick a game and get along.
The views of Max McGraw do not necessarily represent those of the VAFA. He can be contacted at [email protected]